Loneliness During the Holiday Season

According to Psychology Today, loneliness is the discomfort that arises from the gap between the social connection you desire and the connection you actually experience. Essentially it is a lack of social connection. Loneliness can come in different forms - it’s not just about being physically alone. Some people feel lonely even in the presence of others or within relationships. Whatever the circumstances, loneliness can make it challenging to connect with others, find joy, or quiet negative thoughts.

During the holiday season—when so much emphasis is placed on togetherness and joy—feelings of loneliness can feel amplified. Festive activities, heart-warming ads, Christmas movies, and holiday songs often serve as painful reminders of what may be missing: an estranged relationship, the loss of a loved one, or the struggle to form meaningful connections.

If you’re feeling lonely and concerned about how to navigate this holiday season, here are a few suggestions that might help:

1. Stay Connected

Reaching out to loved ones or trusted acquaintances can feel daunting, especially if negative self-talk or low self-esteem whispers doubts like, “They don’t really care about me.” But pushing past those thoughts to connect can be profoundly healing. It will feel vulnerable but it may very well be the thing you need. Whether it’s a phone call, a heartfelt message, or spending time with someone in person, these small acts can bridge the gap you feel.

If connecting with loved ones isn’t an option, consider volunteering, joining community groups, or attending virtual meet-ups that match your interests. These activities can provide a sense of purpose and give you the gift of new connections.

2. Identify Your Triggers

The holiday season often stirs up specific memories or emotions that amplify loneliness. Take some time to reflect and identify what triggers these feelings for you. It might be memories of a loved one who has passed, the end of a meaningful relationship, or even a longing for a family dynamic that isn’t your reality.

Once you’ve identified your triggers, work on addressing them. Journaling, talking to a trusted friend, or seeking professional support can help you process these emotions and lessen their effect on you.

3. Embrace New Traditions

Sometimes, a change in activities or scenery can help to ease the feeling of loneliness. If you’re away from family and friends, think about what activities you can introduce to make the season feel special for you. Whether it’s decorating your space in a way that brings you joy, baking holiday treats, or treating yourself to something meaningful, new traditions can help you feel a sense of comfort and belonging.

Loneliness during the holidays is a difficult but common experience. It doesn’t define your worth or your ability to find connection. While the season’s festivities may highlight what feels absent, it’s also an opportunity to show yourself kindness, embrace the relationships you do have, and even forge new connections.

Remember, your feelings are valid, and the feeling of loneliness won’t last forever. By staying connected, identifying your triggers, and embracing change, you can take small but meaningful steps toward a more fulfilling season.

This holiday season, give yourself permission to grieve what you’re missing, but also to find joy in what you can create. You deserve peace, warmth, and connection—even if it looks different this year.